The Land of NeverWas

I was an insecure, shy kid, never had many friends, always felt I was on the outside looking in. Much later, I found out that life was neither what I'd expected, nor was it what I saw, and envied, about the kids who (or so I thought), "had it all together". So .. I wrote the following.......


I recall so much of childhood .. Of feelings unexplained
I've always felt I missed so much .. Of things I could have gained.
When others danced, their arms entwined, while in my heart I cried
I always wished that I'd been there with someone at my side

And when assembled masses cheered, it never was for me
I thought if I could be out there, that I might be set free
From feelings wrapping 'round my heart and causing me to dwell
In what I thought was outer lands .. My cold and lonesome hell.

But then one day, while on my way, delivering some mail
I met the girl that made me twirl, and made all others pale
For don't you see, she talked to me, and lighted up my life
In her dress of blue, 'twas then I knew, that she would be my wife.

In lots of years, through lots of tears, and laughter from the heart
The duo fine .. I'm hers, she's mine .. Has seldom been apart
And God above has used her love to show me life's great truth
That I knew not, when still a tot .. Nor even in my youth

For now I know that even though I thought I missed so much
That those who danced and played and were admired & cheered and such
Were searching too for values true and meaning for their days
And looking for some sort of door to help them through the maze

That truth be known one can't, alone, or even with a wife
Find one's way through and travel to the focal point of life
For that reward is of the Lord, and his alone to give
And we can only stop the loneliness and start to live

When we finally find that we are blind and cannot satisfy
The longings there ..yea everywhere .. That nag us as we try
To do that thing of which they sing on MTV and such
That leaves us scarred and trying hard to finally know how much

It takes to bring us from our pain to light and air and joy
To feel once more the open door we saw when still a boy
Or girl dragged in to life's great din where we learned to live because
We all went through .. every me and you .. The land of NeverWas.